I remember many years of doubting if I’ll ever find the right guy. Everyone always says there’s plenty of fish in the sea, but no one ever tells you how to find the right fish for you.
I met Cliff at the church we went to. He was a geeky UBC engineering guy, and I was a snowboard-bum-wanna-be SFU economics gal. We were great friends for many years before we dated. And once we started dating, it only took 5 months before he asked my parents for permission to propose to me.
I was never one to believe in marriage. I felt that it was an institution to bind two people together and it sounded kind of like prison to me. But when Cliff asked me to marry him, I screamed and jumped with joy and said yes. Has my view on marriage changed all of a sudden? I guess I just didn’t know what it is like to love someone enough to want to be bound to him, until I met Cliff.
Cliff has always been known as the creative and artistic one amongst our friends. He made me a gazillion handmade cards when we were dating. One time he made me a little glass globe of Vancouver that lit up with tiny little lights. When I went on business trips, he made me advent calendars with love notes in them for each day I was away. He made animated cartoons for me. He cooked gourmet meals for me. Yeah, it was difficult not to fall for this guy.
Through the years we’ve been together, Cliff has been my biggest support. He never questioned me intentions, and he always let me make my own choices. He encouraged me and he helped me. Whenever I failed miserably, he has never said “told you so”.
For the longest time, if you knew me back then, you knew I didn’t want kids. One of the biggest factor for that change of mind is Cliff. I always knew that he would be an amazing dad, so I eventually caved to the idea of having kids because I knew they would have a 50/50 chance of having a good parent. I was right; Cliff is the most patient and loving dad I’ve ever seen.
I have to admit, having kids (as wonderful as the experience is) has given our marriage a good beating. We are both tired and our finances are stretched thin. But I think our friendship as the foundation of our relationship is strong enough to pull us through this time, and we’ll look back at this time one day and be glad we did this together.
I am glad I found my big fish in this big sea. Happy 10th anniversary, Babe!