Nine years ago today, I said “I do” to my bestfriend. Looking back now, it’s hard to believe that it has been nine years.
I was never one to have much dreams or hopes of marriage, as I felt like it was an institution I didn’t believe in. But when Cliff proposed to me, I couldn’t say no, because I wasn’t going to let him get away.
Cliff and I are quite different in a lot of ways. He couldn’t care less if he only had $5 in his bank account, and he never bothered balancing his cheque book. He would spend his last $5 of the month on buying a friend coffee and donuts, and he may end up just eating rice with soy sauce for the rest of the month. Asking him to stick to a budget and keeping his receipts is nearly impossible. But he is generous beyond measure, and his heart is always open to his friends and family. He never turns down a request for help, and he always gives his best willingly. He does not have a mean bone in his body. When people use the expression “a heart of gold”, that’s what Cliff has.
Cliff made me believe that people aren’t always as synical as I am. He made me believe that you don’t need material possessions to be happy with your life. He made me believe that you can genuinely care for someone without expecting anything in return. He made me realize that anger does not solve any problems. He changed how I view people and their intentions.
In nine years, our relationship has grown in many different ways. We’ve both tried really hard to meet somewhere in the middle. For example, I’ve given up reconciling our bank balances, and he has agreed to leave more than $5 in our bank account. I’ve tried to discuss my feelings without yelling, and he tried to discuss his feelings without withdrawing. We’re still working on many things, but I think we’ve made some pretty good progress in nine years.
We are also very similar in some ways. Oh, food, or our love for food, keep us on the quest for the next recipe and a new way of making something. I’ve resolved in my mind that being married to Cliff means I’ll never be skinny, but oh boy would I ever eat well.
In our daily interaction, if I ever have a rough day, I know I can always count on Cliff to be my biggest support and listening ear when I get home. When I do well at something, he is always the first to notice and to express his excitement for me. I never have to doubt his love for me. He is a solid rock I can rely on, and he makes me look forward to coming home.
We have no major plans or presents to celebrate our 9th anniversary. It’s a weekday and I know we’d both be tired. We might have a drink on the balcony after Joshua goes to sleep. Sometimes it’s those quiet and simple moments that make me realize how blessed I am.