Before Joshua came, I had a vague idea of what it would be like to be a mom. I knew that for the first few months, it would be just endless feedings and diapers. As my boss describes it, it is “mind numbing work”. I thought that I would feel like a cow, constantly being demanded to produce milk to feed the baby.

However, nothing can be further from the truth. I LOVE every moment of being a mom for the last 11 days. Yes, there are lots of feedings and diaper changes, lots of pain, fear, frustration and guilt. But all that means nothing when I look at Joshua’s beautiful face. He is clearly a gift from God; something that I do not deserve.

I am addicted to looking at him. Even though I know I should sleep when he is sleeping so I can get some rest, but sometimes I’d rather stay awake and stare at his face.

People complain about the sleepless nights when a newborn. Sure, it can be tiring. But when else would you experience something so precious? What is the big deal of trading off a few hours of sleep? I am sure I will miss this time when one day he does not need or want all this attention from me anymore.

I love it when he looks up at me with his inquisitive eyes. He seems so mature, and so ready to tell me how everything works. I love it when he makes little happy noises when he is feeding, or when he is getting his hair washed. Boy, I don’t know any baby that likes his hair washed this much!

I love holding him in my arms, or putting his little head against my chest, or watching him inch towards me on the couch. I love watching him sleep. I love looking at his toothless gum when he cries. I love watching him pucker up his little lips. I love every little body part on him, especially his little feet.

11 days have gone by so fast. He’s already getting so big!